I Can Be A Good "Stander"

Growing and maturing in every way

Okay, so my thoughts have been all over the place. The other day, we were in a lesson, and my companion and the member were talking back and forth for 20 minutes or so, but I couldn't participate in the conversation because I've never been to the south of Italy and what not, and I caught myself losing the spirit. Instead of letting my emotions get the best of me, the clear thought came into my mind to "Just be a stander, Katie (Sorella Beus...)." **

When I decided to come on the mission, I imagined that there would be those people I would meet, and I would think, “Woah, I came all the way to Italy to be in THIS room, in THIS moment, with THIS person...” but yeah, hasn't happened. Then, during the lesson I was describing earlier, I had the comforting reassurance that I was called to be Sorella Santoro's companion to just support her. I don't need to blow people's socks off with the wonderful sentences I can say in Italian, but simply, maybe I can just be someone else in the room who has the spirit and can testify of the truth. I don't know how well I am explaining myself. I guess all I can say is that I've come to terms with the fact that I may not ever be THAT missionary who has all the right things to say. Maybe I'll never be able to fully express myself. But I am a really good “stander.” I can love like crazy those with whom I interact. I can tell them that I appreciate them and ask if there is anything I can do to help. I can offer prayers in lessons and ask Heavenly Father to soften the hearts of those whom we are teaching so that they can understand and be touched by our message. I can bear pure testimony that I know that Joseph Smith is a true prophet of God. I know that the Book of Mormon is true. I am not ashamed to say I am Mormon. I am grateful for the knowledge I gain every day just by being a part of this church.

I know that there will be down days through the whole mission. We will all feel inadequate at times. But, that is what the Atonement is for. I know that we are not alone in this long road of developing our talents and strengths. This week, find some weakness you have and let the Savior direct you on that road of making that weakness a strength. It is possible. I promise. :) Let me know how it goes.

LOVE you all... so much.

Sorella Katie Beus

** She is referring to the last line of John Milton's Sonnet 16 he wrote upon becoming blind, "They also serve who only stand and wait." That phrase reminds me of temple workers who stand faithfully at their posts and of my beautiful Grandma Rich who was bedridden for many years, who couldn't stand at all, but never complained or lost her sweet testimony. The phrase "God doth not need either man's work or his own gifts: who best bear his mild  yoke, they serve him best." also reminds me to bear, with patience, the trials I have been assigned so that I too, may serve Him best.")  Full text of the poem below) 

Sonnet 16 - By John Milton

When I consider how my light is spent

Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,

And that one talent which is death to hide

Lodg'd with me useless, though my soul more bent

To serve therewith my Maker, and present

My true account, lest he returning chide,

"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"

I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent

That murmur, soon replies: "God doth not need

Either man's work or his own gifts: who best

Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state

Is kingly; thousands at his bidding speed

And post o'er land and ocean without rest:

They also serve who only stand and wait."

http://litmed.med.nyu.edu/Annotation?action=view&annid=1129

Although blind, John Milton went on to write the epic poem, “Paradise Lost”